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Friday, March 22, 2013

Potty Training Boys - Heaven Help Us


"I saw a white ladder all covered with water...It's a hard rain's a-gonna fall." - Bob Dylan

   Having a girl first was the ultimate life troll. We were certain any children that followed would be as easy as her. Friends and family tried to tell us otherwise, but our vast knowledge in parenting was so evident that we couldn't be swayed. I have since learned to love the flavor of humble pie. 

   The above image indicates the success of our potty training efforts. The Wife was downstairs in the kitchen trying to get our 'Lil Miss off to school when she heard the intro to "Don't Go Chasing Waterfalls" landing on our entry way floor. Incredulous, she gazed at the golden cascade of arched precipitation. Clean up was a bear, and I received the image via phone MMS while at work. I gave him a full 10.0 for the arc it took to get that kind of range up against the wall like that. 

   We've thrown Cheerios and Fruit Loops in the potty for bathroom sniper school. It was going well, until a long drive to the zoo one day that involved a freeway stop and a well placed bush. A highway patrolman was kind enough to let us off with a "be careful" when he stopped by. Since then, we've caught him taking bio breaks off the front porch, back porch, side of house, and into the sand box. Dang, son,...it goes in the potty! 

   There are tons of methods, ways, old wives tales, and witchcraft on the topic. I'm not gonna list them all. The one that's worked the best for us is to get him out of an overnight diaper and into undies quick. We then ask and take him every 15-20 minutes. Things are getting better these days, though if he's on ANY type of electronic device, it's water works and a change of shorts. Know your kid and keep trying. I know it's hard,....I'M DOING IT!!! Soon we'll all be dry and happy. Best of luck. 

J. 


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