Overcoming Your Child's Fear At The Doctor

 

"I have dangerous bones in my body." - Vin Diesel

 

   My 3YO 'Lil Man has had knee aches for some time now. We have always thought it was growing pains, playing hard, etc. To make sure, we visited his pediatrician late last week and she ordered x-rays to be done that day on another floor. My brave man looked to his parents for some additional support. He's wears a pretty good poker face, but the uncharted frontier of x-rays was a bit much.

 

The hardest part about overcoming your child's fear at the doctor office is that you can't force it. You simply cannot MAKE them okay with something they're unsure of. I've said it in previous posts that I believe it comes with the time you put into your parenting. Sure, even MY kids can look at me like I'm insane despite my best efforts to calm their nerves. This trip happened to work out just fine, just like I think it can be for any one's children. I try my hardest to give a general, but hones play by play. It seems to work most of the time and so I continue to use that method. Again, my daughter can turn that method upside down in about 7 seconds with her irrational fears of what amounts to practically nothing sometimes. Still, most times it works out just fine.

 

 My 'Lil Guy walked into the room with my just fine. The tech asked me to get him down to his undies before getting him up on the table. My brave guy smile and whispered to me that he was scared. I knelt down, held him close, and walked him through what the x-ray camera was and what it was going to do, as I got his shorts off. I picked him up into a bear hug, and then gently laid him on the table, hugging him the whole way. I was allowed to hold his hand during the process, donning my own lead apron that Superman couldn't have gazed through. You can see by the second pic to the left here, that he was pretty easy going about it. He thought the cod piece covering his junk from the radiation was pretty funny too.

 

   Afterward, he got to see the pics of his own bones. He was appropriately impressed and grossed out at the same time. No less than what I thought would be the case. I really think that he found it interesting that he could see his own bones. He's that kind of inquisitive. We left without fanfare, and I think it can be that way with most kids if you build the relationship of trust and honesty (about MOST things) along the way. I knew someone who would so overdo the buildup of things like the doctor office, walking through a casino, etc., that the kid was thoroughly freaked out before stepping foot in what ever venue was being described. Lame, and shame on that person for overdoing it. It can be more simple, until your child is ready for more information.

 

'Till then, turn and cough.

 

J.

 

 

Swim Lessons and Our Children's Fears

"We have nothing to fear but, AHHHHH!!!! What the heck was that?" - Sort of John F. Kennedy

   I grew up with a pool in our back yard. I can remember our swim lessons given, one brother at at time. Our back stroke technique sounded something like "farmer John, airplane, torpedo, glide." After the fear of swimming is gone and confidence is in abundance, it's sunny days from there on out. However, right now, we have our oldest two little ones in lessons. They've graduated from paddle boards and hand holding. As you can see from the picture above, they've quite literally been "thrown into the deep end."

   The fear of sinking is heavy in our household as of late. I can remember the overwhelming void of the deep end when I was young. As parents we can provide all the support and encouragement possible, but what pushes them in mentally in the end? I feel that it's partly their trust in us as their mother, father, or both. Have we earned that trust to be cashed in for bravery in times like swim lessons? I also believe it's their confidence in themselves. Some of it is innate, but I think there is a lot to be said for how we raise our little ones. Do we build them up with positive reinforcement? This kind of support will give them the confidence to try new things like swimming, public speaking, school performances, etc. 

   I have daydreams of pool parties, lake trips, perhaps a water polo player, and the like. Mostly, I just want my children to have fun in the pool and have a safe time while there.  The endless hours I spent in the pool as a child can be the same endless hours for my children very soon. The Wife and I try to compliment their bravery and hard work at practicing. They love to do well and want to get better, that much is evident. I suppose like anything else they will try, success comes through various channels. Attend to them all as well as you can, and hopefully there will be a lot of enjoyment along the way. 

   I leave you with a pic of my swim lessons (at around 7 years old, like my 'Lil Miss right now). I showed my two new swimmers in hopes they would see that I was learning at one point also. What I got was, "Why does your face look like that?" and, "Why are you so red?" I like how they focus on the obvious and skirt the real issues. In the end, it's another rite of passage and we all need to face the same obstacles. Swimming is just the tip of the iceberg my little ones. Here's to a lifetime of brave moments. 

Happy swimming!

J.